


The Life He Could Have Had

by Saladofhumanflesh



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Gotham (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Edward Nygma Loves Oswald Cobblepot, Fluff, Hopeful Ending, How Do I Tag, M/M, Oswald Cobblepot Loves Edward Nygma, Pining Oswald Cobblepot, Riddler is doing things right, Season/Series 04, a little angsty, because Ed is dumb, i think, split personality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:27:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25918825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saladofhumanflesh/pseuds/Saladofhumanflesh
Summary: A request surprises Edward Nygma.
Relationships: Martin & Edward Nygma, Oswald Cobblepot & Edward Nygma, Oswald Cobblepot & Martin, Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma
Comments: 6
Kudos: 66





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction I translated, so please be kind and let me know what you think about it.

A knock on the door of his new apartment tore him from any thoughts he just had. He was ready to kill on an instant. _Nobody knows that I'm here._ He took the loaded gun that he always kept in the desk drawer and slowly went to the door. Again there was a knock, more urgent this time, and he almost dropped his gun in shock.

**“You're pathetic.”** , the Riddler commented on him flinching.

He ignored it. He approached the door cautiously, always careful not to utter the slightest note.

“Edward Nygma, if you don't open this door right now I will-” He recognized the loud, energetic voice immediately and opened the door, causing the man in front of him to drop the threat he was about to make.

“Oswald.”, he and the Riddler said simultaneously.

The surprise must've been written all over his face because Oswald smiled smugly at him.

“How do you...?”, he wanted to ask, but then dropped the question.

_Oswald finds out everything if he wants to, what am I even thinking?_ The Riddler leaned on his shoulder and let his gaze wander over Oswald.

**“The Question you should ask yourself is why he is even here at all. Last time I checked you wanted to kill each other.”**

_Oh. That's true._ Ed pointed the gun at Oswald.

“What are you doing here?”, he asked, his voice was empty and cold.

**“Tell me, Ed, how long do you want to pretend that you hate him?”** , Riddler asked.

Before he could respond to that question Oswald raised a hand as if to calm him down.

“I'm not here to kill you and I would really appreciate you doing me the same favor.”, he said. Then he continued:”I am here because I have to ask you for something and... Ed, could you please put that gun down?”

Ed didn't move a muscle, which made Oswald sigh.

“I'm sorry, I guess I shouldn't have come here.”, he said discouraged, turned on his heel and started to leave.

“Wait.”, Ed said while lowering his gun.

Oswald turned around instantly as if he had only been waiting for him to stop him.

**“He knows us.”**

_Shut up._ Edward went over to his desk to put the gun back into the drawer and seated himself on one of the two chairs which stood at the small round table in front of the window. Oswald understood that gesture, went inside and closed the door behind him before he sat down on the other chair. _His leg seems to be particularly painful today._

**“See, you do it again.”**

_What?_

**“You worry about him.”**

The Riddler leaned against the wall behind him and it was hard to not turn around and tell him that he certainly wasn't worried about Oswald Cobblepot. Never again.

“So, what do you want Oswald?”, he asked coolly.

**“Feels good to say his name again, doesn't it?”**

He took a deep breath to calm down.

“Ed, are you alright?”, Oswald asked, the genuine concern in his voice was hurting Ed.

He nodded.

**“Was that the answer to his question or mine?”** , the Riddler asked mockingly.

“SHUT UP!”

Oswald suddenly stood next to him, laying a hand on his shoulder.

“What did he say?”

Ed just shook his head. That familiarity hurt. Oswald looked at him, and oh, how long had they not been able to look each other in the eye, be it out of shame, anger or sadness. _Green and blue, like the sea._

**“Beautiful but dangerous”** , Riddler agreed.

_Why does it have to be him of all people who can understand me, who always understood me?_

**“You have to tell him already.”**

“I can't.”

_Not after everything that has happened._

**“Bullshit!”**

Oswald quickly took his hand off his shoulder and that was when Ed noticed, that he had accidentally talked out loud. He could feel it nonetheless.

“Ed, I... I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me.”, Oswald said quietly, looking quite sad.

He seemed like he wanted to reach out for something but couldn't get a hold of it. Ed watched him sitting down again. Oswald took a deep breath, apparently to say something important. _He wanted to ask me something._

“So,”, the man in front of him cleared his throat.

“I have a request, as I already mentioned earlier. I know, I'm asking for too much, maybe, and that we're not... that I actually don't have any right to ask you for a favor but... It's that I have to appear on a meeting with important people this afternoon. Certainly, you understand that I have to be there. Olga called in sick today and now I don't have anyone who's watching Martin until I'm back. What I want to say is... so, my question is-”

“If I would be amenable with watching Martin.”, Ed completed Oswalds sentence.

He nodded in response and said:”He knows you and he seems to like you. Besides, you are the only one I trust enough to take care of him while I'm gone.”

_What?_

“We tried to kill each other countless times and-”

“No Edward, you have tried to kill me countless times! If I really would have wanted you dead then you wouldn't sit here right now!”, Oswald interrupted him, his voice sharp like a knife.

Ed raised his hands defensively.

“Fine, either way, why should you trust me, me of all people, after everything that has happened between us?”

**“You know why.”** , the Riddler interfered.

He tried to blend him out. Oswald looked at him, and he looked at Oswald. They saw each other, not only the outer shell of their bodies, but also what was behind it.

“Okay.”, he heard himself say.

“Okay?” Oswalds eyes seemed hopeful.

“Okay.”, he said again.

“So, do we have a truce? Just for today, of course.”, Oswald asked, still a little bit unsure.

“Just for today.”, Ed agreed, though he would have preferred to say something else.

_For ever._

“Well then... pack everything you need.”, Oswald said, visibly relieved.

He didn't pack anything except his keys and his phone. Suddenly he stopped in his motion. A feeling of unease crept over him.

“Oswald, who is watching Martin right now?”, he asked, unsuccessfully trying to hide his suspicion.

“Ed, he is at school.”, Oswald said, and Ed noticed that his question had hurt him.

“Oh.”

Oswald turned around and marched out of the apartment without a word. Ed locked the door and followed him, it wasn't hard to catch up with the other man. A car was waiting for them in front of the building entrance. They both sat down in the back. Oswald looked out of the window, trying to seem truly offended, as he told Gabe to drive them home.

_Home._


	2. Chapter 2

_Everything is still in its place._

He looked around in the old building that he called home for a long time. Nothing had changed.

Oswald stepped up next to him and stared at the floor.

"If you want to pass the time, you can go to your old room. I left everything as it was.", he said.

Ed nodded absently. He didn't really want to go in there.

With slow steps he went to the large dining table made of solid wood to run the palm of his hand over it.

A thought flashed through his mind when his hand touched the table top.

Maybe he could use the truce to sort out some things with Oswald, or rather, to find out some things.

"Oswald?"

"Hm?"

The addressed man seemed to have been torn from his thoughts by his words.

"What were you going to tell me that evening when..."

He couldn't finish his sentence. Thinking about it and actually saying it out loud were two really different things.

He started again.

"You've been trying to tell me something all day and... I mean, I know where you were going with that. I'm just... curious, I guess."

Oswald's gaze darkened.

"That was a long time ago, Ed, and I don't think now is a good time to talk about it."

"Then when is a good time?"

"I think we missed it."

Ed was about to say something back when the front door was unlocked. Oswald's features loosened visibly.

Martin immediately ran to him and they hugged each other. Watching them hug triggered something unknown in Edward.

Then the two separated, and Martin looked at Oswald with a questioning look. He immediately started to explain the situation.

"Edward will keep you company tonight, I have an important meeting, and Olga is ill today, as you know."

Martin wrote something on the small notepad that always hung around his neck and showed it to Oswald.

"I know that you don't need a babysitter, I just want you to be safe." Oswald replied.

The boy turned back to his block. Then he turned to Ed and held up the rewritten page so he could read it.

_"How long are you staying?"_

"Only until Oswald is back." he replied.

Martin didn't seem to like this answer because he turned back to Oswald and didn't look at Ed anymore.

_Did I say something wrong?_

**"You mean like always?"**

The Riddler sat on the table, grinning.

_What are you trying to say?_

The spitting image of him clicked his tongue in disdain.

**"You never say what you really want."**

_Of course I do!_

" **No, Eddie, you always say what you think it is that you should want."**

_I'm sorry, what?_

The Riddler clapped his hands.

**"Think about it."**

With these words he disappeared.

Ed wanted to turn back to Oswald and Martin but they were gone.

Oswald?", he shouted questioningly.

No answer. He went into the large living room with the comfortable sofa and the massive fireplace, which was always lit up, no matter what time of day you decided to spend a little time in this room of the house.

There was no one here either, so he decided to go upstairs, to the second floor where the bedrooms were.

He knocked on the door of Oswald's room, but there was no noise coming from the inside.

Instead the door behind him opened.

Martin was holding his block towards him

_"He already left"_

"He didn't tell me.", said Ed.

_Why didn't he say goodbye?_

Martin looked at him inscrutably, and then something seemed to occur to him, because suddenly a smile spread across his face.

Ed took the note from his hand and adjusted his glasses.

_"Dad said you like to play video games."_

He had to smirk and looked at Martin with a conspiratorial look.

"Is this a challenge?"

When Oswald got home shortly before midnight, Ed was sitting on the sofa in front of the crackling chimney fire.

He had spent the last two hours staring thoughtfully into the flames which caused his eyes to burn.

Oswald sat down next to him, he looked exhausted.

Ed turned to him.

"How was your meeting?"

Oswald escaped an amused snort.

"Let's just say more people showed up than left."

Ed had to grin.

_They must have underestimated him, people often do._

"How was it with Martin? Did you get along?"

His grin widened.

"He's great. Really, I can see why you like having him around."

Oswald smiled.

"I thought you would get along well. You're quite similar." he said.

“You think so? I mean, in terms of interests, yes, but when it comes to expression and action, I see more of a mini-penguin." Ed interjected.

For a while they were both silent.

"Martin asked me earlier if I could stay.", Ed said and broke the silence.

Oswald smiled sadly.

"He's a good kid."

Ed looked at him questioningly. Oswald sighed in resignation.

"He knows that I... He just wants me to be okay."

Ed didn't know what to say, he just sat there staring at Oswald.

He returned the constant eye contact.

Both seemed to lose themselves in the eyes of the other, long gone memories came back up, they seemed to wonder how it could have come to this, what time had done to them, both appeared to wish that it would just stay like this, if only for one more day.

Then reality grabbed them by the shoulders and tore them from their dreams.

"I should go," Edward broke the silence again.

Oswald nodded.

"Gabe will drive you back to your apartment."

Both got up and walked slowly to the front door. They stood face to face, each of them seemed to want to delay the farewell.

"Thanks Ed, honestly. I owe you."

Edward nodded and stepped out into the fresh nights air.

With his hands buried in the pockets of his jacket he walked to the waiting car.

His legs felt heavy and every step he took put more weight on them.

He turned around, and could see it before him, the life he could have had if he hadn't been such a coward at the time, and had told Oswald how he felt. What he was still feeling.

**"Go back."**

The Riddler stood next to him, and he too had fixed his eyes on Oswald, who was still standing in the doorway.

Both watched as he finally turned around to go inside and close the door behind him.

**"We won't get another chance."** , the Riddler said emphatically.

"Oswald!" Ed heard himself yelling.

The door swung open again.


End file.
